


A Stay At The Smash Resort

by jasmineryu



Category: Super Smash Brothers
Genre: Angst, Bad Jokes, Bayonetta is a good mom, F/M, Fluff and Humor, I suck at tagging, Little Mac is 18, M/M, Plot Twists, Ryu and Ken are bros, Satire, Violence, because i don't want the FBI after me, surprise villain - Freeform, then everything turns to literal hell, they're all just chillin and whatnot, this will most likely be a flop
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-19
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:01:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28179555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jasmineryu/pseuds/jasmineryu
Summary: THOUGHTS FROM THE AUTHOR: so basically.... i don't really know what was the thought process behind this. prepare for some terrible characterization and writing from me because that is definitely not what i excel at!! oh and most of the ships in this fic are crack pairings. pls take that with a grain of salt >_<Join Mario and the entire Super Smash Bros. Roster as they embark on the greatest (and very underwhelming) journey of a lifetime! Okay, that may be a bit of an overstatement. They receive a letter from none other than Masahiro Sakurai, inviting them to come stay a few months at the Wii Sports resort, Wuhu Island. What started as a relaxing trip quickly changes as it becomes a struggle for survival.. Will they make it out alive, or could their time there end in tragedy? Find out as the plot unravels in A Stay At The Smash Resort!
Relationships: Alex/Steve (Minecraft), Bayonetta & Joker (not romantic), Chun-Li/Ryu (implied), Ken Masters & Ryu (Street Fighter), Ken Masters/Ryu (Street Fighter), Link/Zelda (Legend of Zelda), Mario/Peach-hime | Peach Toadstool, Princess Daisy/Luigi, Samus Aran/Little Mac
Kudos: 9





	1. The Invitation

It was an ordinary day in the SSBU arena, with some fighters sparring and others making conversation. Their chatter soon halted when Mario came hastily rushing in with an envelope tightly grasped in his hand, a wide grin spread across his face. He stopped for a moment to catch his breath, throwing his hands on his knees as he hunched over. He held up a shaky finger, wheezing out a few words in between his occasional ragged breathing. "Jus.. *HUFF* Just gimme a.. *wheeze* minute.." The people in the crowd exchanged looks as they stood in silence. He quickly regained his composure, plastering on his signature smile. "We received a letter in the mail this morning." He said, holding up the receptacle in his hand. "Er, yeah? We get that kinda stuff everyday. Fan-mail, celebrity gossip magazines, annoying spam.. What exactly makes this one in particular so special?" Someone spoke, which prompted a few murmurs in agreement from others. Mario scoffed and laughed in response, gesturing his thumb to the nicely written calligraphy on the front which wrote ‘Masahiro Sakurai’. "If its-a from the big man himself, then it has to mean something." Remarked the Italian plumber. A majority of the throngs eyes widened and they began exclaiming among one another, wondering what could be so important. "Well? Open it already!" A person hollered, getting impatient from all the time he was wasting on talking rather than reading the note. "Alright, alright! Sheesh.." He said as he began to peel it open. Once he was finally done, he reached for and held the white slip of paper, pulling it out of the casing. His eyes surveyed the message. 

_On Monday, March 1, 2021, the staff at Nintendo HQ are convening a special vacation exclusively for the Smash Bros. Ultimate character roster. We invite you all to come stay at the Wii Sports resort, Wuhu Island, as a tribute to having over 70+ playable fighters. Everyone will be assigned a luxury suite of their very own, along with accommodations such as a pool and spa. You are given two days to pack your belongings. Don’t be late!_

_Sincerely,_

_Masahiro Sakurai  
Director/game designer at Nintendo and Sora Ltd. ___

__The situation quickly became frantic as people realized they had only two days to get everything prepared upon leaving. "Oh, goodness!" Peach yelped, her eyebrows upturned in sheer panic. "Two days?! That’s hardly enough time! I have to pack my hair brush, shampoo, conditioner, makeup, cosmetics, undergarments, shirts, pants, towels, hygiene products, blow dryer, dresses, accessories, shoes, socks, lip injection kit-" Mario placed a comforting hand on the small of her back. "It’s alright, Peach! Don't-a fret. You can just get Daisy and the girls to help you! You’ll get the job finished in no time." She looked at him, her expression softening. "I-I guess you’re right.. Please excuse my behavior. I tend to overreact a bit!" She chuckled, cheeks slightly flushed out of embarrassment. "Ah, don’t worry about it! I’m sure you aren’t the only one." He said, turning around slowly to focus on the crowd behind him. "Right, guys?" His lips cracked into a smile that came off more as life-threatening than welcoming. They collectively gulped. "Pika, pika?.." Pikachu vocalized, tilting its adorable head slightly. "Uh, yeah. What that guy said." Snake chimed in, hovering his eyes over the beloved yellow Pokemon. Mario sighed under his breath, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Okay. Get ready, you guys! We wouldn’t want to keep Mr. Sakurai waiting!" And with the snap of his gloved finger, everyone was dismissed._ _


	2. The Arrival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two days passed and everyone is here!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the lengthy hiatus! I put extra time and care into writing this. And yes, that is Alfonzo from Spirit Tracks. My brother had that brilliant idea so all credit goes to him. Fixed a couple of grammar mistakes and time inconsistences in the first chapter! Hope you enjoy this one.

After two days of persevering and industrious work, the moment everyone was waiting for had finally come; their departure. Mario stood outside the train station, eyeing his watch with every minute that passed. Other miscellaneous dialogue regarding the vacation filled the area, spreading like wildfire. “Do you think we’ll meet Sakurai in person?” Peach whispered to Daisy who was leaning against a wall, her arms crossed idly. “Nah, I doubt it. The guy is rich, I’m sure he has better things to do.” Ryu clicked his tongue, “I don’t know if that’s entirely true. If he didn’t want anything to do with us, then we’d be back in the arena fighting, not here.” Daisy shrugged, coming to terms with his argument. “You’re probably right.” As they continued speaking, a faint chugging sound could be heard in the distance, catching their attention. Mario gleamed, letting out a repressed sigh of relief. “They’re finally here!” 

A broad-shouldered, well built man sauntered out. “Aye. I’m Alfonzo and I’ll be your locomotive engineer. Toon link will take care of any questions you have so no need to bother me with all that.” The small boy, now clad in typical conductor attire, gave the train whistle a firm tug. “Hya aargh!” Mario maneuvered through the crowd now gathered around Alfonzo. “You’re three hours late! We were beginning to think you and the bambino had forgotten to pick us up.. I expect better next time.” “Ah, my condolences.” He briefly apologized, “me and Link got into a little holdup during our way here, won’t let it happen again, man.” Mario nodded understandingly. “I hope not. Let's-a go, people!” He clapped his hands in an enthusiastic manner as a way to usher everyone into boarding. They contentedly obliged, carrying and lugging around whatever baggage they had in their possession. The interior was astonishingly well-furnished, something which caught them at surprise. To their own personal amusement, the unimaginative, bland decor they were expecting was quickly debunked, instead being replaced with exquisite and intricately tailored designs. “Alright, look, I get the place is nice, but would ya at least take a seat?” Alfonzo said as he exhaled through his nostrils, a slightly agitated look on his face. It was made evident to the passengers that he would rather be anywhere else. Without hesitation, they shuffled into their chairs, all of which were immaculately padded with the softest material. “Okay, thanks. We’re not forgetting anyone, are we?” He inquired. Mario looked around, making note of how many heads were present and if there weren’t any absences. “Nope. You’re good!” He gave a thumbs up of approval. Toon Link channeled into the speakers. “Hup, hup, yaa! Ha, oof, raaaagh!” “He says we will be moving shortly and to stand clear of any doors.” Alfonzo translated. “You are a life-saver. So glad we have someone who can understand whatever language Link is speaking..” Ken expressed with his muscular arms folded. “No problem. Now you just relax, we’re gonna be in here for a while.”  
___

It had been three hours. The majority was either asleep or on the cusp of dozing off, with Link and Alfonzo checking and tending to everyone’s needs periodically. “Darling, have you got any endives with salad? Or Mediterranean Shrimp Kabobs? Despite her trying to kill me most of the time, Jeanne could make quite the meal.” Bayonetta asked, waving either of the two over. “Uh, well, I got a half eaten pint of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream. That good enough?” Said Alfonzo. She groaned, ignoring her ordinarily picky taste in cuisine as she was starving. “Yes. Of course. Could you serve it to me in a bowl, please?” “Anything for you, miss prissy.” Bayonetta resisted the urge to severely injure him with her Scarborough Fair, although the set of those four-large caliber handguns were beginning to look enticing. “Here.” He handed her the ice cream, now served in a marble dish. “Could you wash the spoon?” “Listen, lady, just eat the damn thing. I don’t have time to polish utensils for you. There are 70 other people on board, as you can see.” She scoffed, dumbfounded by his lack of respect. He was lucky there wasn’t a manager around. “You’re just begging for eternal damnation. Aren’t you?” Joker defended. Bayonetta felt nothing less of a proud mom. “Sweetie, this is grown-up business. I greatly appreciate it, though.” She assured. He obeyed reluctantly. The train began slowing it’s pace, traversing along the tracks in a steady motion. All who were previously resting jolted awake. “Attention! We’re here. Please remain seated until me or Link say otherwise.” Alfonzo notified, emanating delighted clamors from others. After a few minutes, which seemed frustratingly long to most as they could hardly contain themselves, their ride stopped. Toon Link allowed his sweaty grip on the brake lever to cease. He cracked his knuckles, feeling satisfied after a long time of work and borderline child labor. The doors opened. “You may now leave in an orderly fashion.” Alfonzo said, making sure to exert plenty of emphasis on the adjective as he wanted to establish that rushing was unnecessary. Much to his annoyance, everyone came hurriedly running out, not even bothering to stretch their limbs. Toon Link waved goodbye cheerfully, wiping away beads of sweat on his forehead. “Those guys sure were a handful.. Let’s hope room service and the concierges can handle ‘em.” Alfonzo muttered, inducing a chuckle from Link.


End file.
